Tuesday, September 21, 2010

5 Rules NOT to Break at Your Wedding

Recently, Brides.com featured a whole big article on rules to break at your wedding giving us a whole bunch of fun ideas in the process.  Additionally, they also gave us 5 rules not to break and I felt that they were worth repeating (with additional comments from yours truly, of course, because you know I have an opinion on everything hehe).  

I love a good mid-western wedding- I am an Illinois girl, after all!  Just remember to suggest to guests to wear wedge heels or flats to this type of ceremony.  No one wants to ruin a good pair of stilettos in the dirt...

1. Make sure there's no more than an hour of downtime between the ceremony's end and the start of the reception. It's just not nice to force out-of-towners to kill the better part of an afternoon in a doughnut shop.

What EB has to say: There is often times more than just an hour of downtime between the ceremony and reception.  I've been to weddings where the ceremony is at 2 and the reception doesn't start til 6.  The idea isn't so much to have under an hour of downtime, it's to make sure you have something for guests to do in between.   For example, when my parents got married, they had little pre-receptions at the bride's and groom's parent's houses (they lived in the same town).  They served hors d'œuvres and gave guests a chance to visit and regroup before the second wave of festivities.  The bottom line is to make sure guests aren't sitting in the reception hall parking lot for 2 hours waiting for it to start. 

2. Keep guests in the loop. That means having the DJ or emcee explain anything unusual (e.g., that you and Dad are shooting hoops at the reception instead of having a first dance).

What EB has to say:  I have heard of couples forgoing a band or DJ and, instead, using an Ipod playlist to keep the guests dancing the night away.  This sounds like an awesome way to save a grand or two but it may not be a great idea.  The DJ or bandleader doesn't just play music, they also keep the night moving along.  So unless you plan on grabbing the mic and announcing each step of the evening yourself, plan on hiring someone else to do it.

3. Be hosts. Greet all of your guests, even if you don't know some, either on a receiving line or by going table-to-table. And don't ask anyone to pay for anything. (No cash bar!)

What EB has to say:  This is so important!!  I get really irritated when I hear brides complaining about having to take time to greet everyone.  Do they not realize that all these people are here to see them? and have spent lots of money (shower gift, new outfit, hotel, transportation, wedding gift etc) to be there?  I'm not saying don't kick back and have fun, but just make sure to greet and sincerely thank each and every person.  Nobody wants to feel unappreciated.  As far as cash bar goes, don't do it (unless it's a brunch type wedding or something)!  At the very least, have beer and wine.  A way to cut costs would be to skip favors.  Most guests would much rather have a few cocktails over an organza bag of Jordan almonds.  And for the love of God, don't do something like "beer and wine for the guests, open liquor bar for the bridal party".  I went to a wedding where they did this and it was the definition of tacky!

4. Throw a wedding, not a business conference. Avoid long speeches, longer slideshows, and anything that smacks of sponsorship ("Flowers provided by Pay Back Gardens"). Your guests are there to have fun.

What EB has to say:  I totally agree!  And if do choose to do a slideshow (which can be super cute, as long as it doesn't run too long) do it during dinner.  That way guests are entertained and you aren't cutting into dancing time.

5. Make guests' comfort your priority. Inviting an elderly aunt? Don't make her scale a small alp to get to the ceremony. Tying the knot at a farm? Let guests know they should leave the heels and ties at home. And—duh—make sure there's plenty of food and drink.

 What EB has to say:  Again, this is super important.  Guests typically don't look back at a wedding and say "Wow! That was a really detail-oriented wedding!", they look back and say "Wow! That was the most fun wedding I've ever been to!".  However, your guests wont look back say that if they felt their needs weren't accomodated.

What are your thoughts on these rules?  Do you agree? or am I waaaaay off base??? Please share your opinions below!!

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